Home & Garden Humor
Martha Stewart Parody


Garden, Gardening and Vegetable Jokes

Did you hear about the little sweet potato that fell madly in love with Peter Jennings?

Her folks wouldn't let her marry him 'cause he was just a common tater.

"I think," said the sweet potato, "therefore, I yam"

Q: What do you get when you cross an onion with a donkey?

A: 99 times out of 100 you get an onion with long ears. But, 1 time out of 100, you'll get a piece of ass that makes your eyes water!

Q: Why did the tomato turn red?
A: Because it saw the salad dressing!

Q: What do you call a honeymoon salad?
A: Lettuce alone.

Q: What vegetable might you find in your basement?
A: Cellar-y.

Q: What is green and goes to a summer camp?
A: A Brussels' scout.

Q: What vegetable do you need a plumber for?
A: A Leek.

Q: Why do potatoes make good detectives?
A: Because they keep their eyes peeled.

Q. What vegetable can you throw away the outside, cook the inside, eat the outside, and throw away the inside?
A. Corn.

Q: What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
A: Kids don't eat broccoli.






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Martha Stewart


More Gardening Jokes and Homeowner Humor

Garden Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Vegetable Jokes | 5 | 6 |
Home and Homeowner Humor | 7 | 8 | 9 |


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